Why...

Why does it feel like i've just been rejected?
Why have I been feeling so shit almost every day of the week?
Why the fuck does it happen to me?
Why do I get myself into these things?
Why can't she just say she doesnt like me, instead of just letting me think she does?
Why did she have to tell me that?
Why cant I be like all other guys?
What do they have that I dont?
Why cant I just ask a girl out?
Why am I such a wimp?
Why cant I be confident?
Why do I always expect the worse?

...whats the hell is wrong with me?

....why am I just utterly crap!?!

Comparisons

Right, well i've nearly been at uni now for 2 weeks.. and there have been MANY up's and down's! And I think that the downs out number the ups. So im gonna see if this is true...

Right, to start off. the positives!

• Meet some new people
• No limit on when I can be on the internet
• Free reign to eat what ever I like
• New area to explore
• Freedom to drink what I like
• Independance, i'm learning how to look after myself
• The other people on my course are nice
• Im not roomed with a dick

Now for the negatives...

• I'm not 100% sure the course is right for me
• I dont like being away from my vest friends
• Not really friends with that many people
• On several nights I havnt been able to get to sleep due to excess noise
• It's possibly hindering a relationship (not that it would happen anyway)
• I miss mum's cooking
• Over spending
• Location isnt exactly the best, tree's are far better than a wall look at
• Still dont feel at home
• nealry settled in, but there are still certain times where I've been majorly unsettles
• Going to be doing more work that at college, I thought there would be less work =/
• I miss going to the pub with 'the pub crew' upon a Thursday night
• Miles away from friends

So yea, thats it really! Uni = not fun, for the moment!

When the going gets tough...

... I think about going home!

Well, still not 100% that I wanna be here... I start properly in Monday, but I still get the feeling that it wont be what I was expecting! On the plus side, getting on with the roomies SLIGHTLY better, but they're still rather loud! :P But hopefully that noise will bugger off when everyone goes to lectures and decides that parting until 1:30am isn't a good thing! Go a welcome party to Athena Hall tonight, so I will be awake until about 1am again! Don't know if I want to go to it. Its only down a flight of stairs though, so its not like its 5 billion miles away! =/

Also, I've started to collect cans, of fiz :P 4 Tango and 1 Pepsi at the moment, making little towers in my window xD But if I look out I can see a whole coffee table with cans of Fosters on it! must be over 50 cans there! How someone can drink that much Fosters in 4 days I don't know! But good luck to them, bet your liver LOVES you!

In other news, I now have PVA glue and some sticky tape! xD Good times shopping, as I now also have boooooooze! Aint going shopping in Asda again though, its nice and cheap, but just MILES away. We had to grab a bus from the middle of town, took 15 mins to get to Asda from there, plus then there was the walk to town centre, and that was a a 10 minute walk! So we're just going to order online next time! Unless its only about 3 things we need, then I'm going down to 'lil Tesco! That's only 4 mins away after all! May be more expensive, but I'm not trekking all the way to Asda when there's a Tesco so close to me!

...I miss Yateley, the view I had... the silence... my friends! Just not the same here! Packing in is still a possibility! I just got to hang in for a tad longer. If I still don't like it, I may see it I can pack it in and come home! Still gotta pay the rent for the room, but I can do that!

Right, I'm either gonna go glue random shit down, or go and make din dins. Soup is on my menu tonight, just cos I cant be arsed to cook anything else! xD

See ya peeps!

Uni life...

Well, 1st blog from my room at UCS!

What can I say really,, arrived Wednesday, only Leonie was here. Nice couple of days where it was just the two of us, nice and quiet, and no random people knocking on the door at 11pm! Laura also moved in on weds. but she than ran off and came back on Sunday. By then Ben and Georgia had also moved in (Saturday). Ben's alright, doesn't like football though, so I cant go watch football with someone i know! :( Georgie and Laura are getting on well, they're alright, but not from my kinda crowd...

Oh well, I couldn't pick my roomies, just have to make do for this year! Hopefully is will be alright =/

Went shopping Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Sunday :P So I pretty much know my way around Ipswich now (Well, I can get to the bank and WHSmiths easily, that's about it!). Induction day today, it was annoying to say the least. To many talks, not enough getting to know people. I don't like the course as much now though its been explained to me, more work then I though (Possibly more that college! :() not happy bout that. And I'm being forced to work during welcome week! I thought the idea of welcome week was just to get to know people?!? Not to f***ing work! But today has been all down hill really! Woke up wondering whether I actually wanted to be here, wanted to pack in it cos I thought I wasn't where I wanted to be, I'd rather be at home where I'm in familiar surroundings and where I have more than 2 friends... well, I've met more people, just don't know them well enough to call them friends yet!

As I speak, I can just about hear the podcast I have playing on my lappy, Georgia's music is overpowering it though! She's nice to talk to on the odd occasion, but she has randomly invited people over to have a party without me knowing, so we ended up with about 8 people in our kitchen, which kept me awake until about 1:30am! So last night I got about 5 hours sleep, which didn't help my mood! =/

Anyway, I'm thinking wait til xmas to see how I feel about uni, if I'm still unsure about if I wanna do, I think I'll pack it in and return home to lovely Blackwater in Surrey! After all, whats the point of doing something you're not 100% sure of?! I know it's not best way to live my life, but its the best thing I can think of at the moment!

Anyway, I'll update once more when I feel like it, so I'll see(imagine) you all then
Bye bye

Time flies...

When you do fuck all! :P

Literally done nothing recently, didn't take advantage of the good weather, I stayed inside the house for some reason!

Mostly my weeks have consisted of driving lessons, football practice and pubbing it up a notch! But no driving lesson today, its tomorrow at 5pm! Which means I miss dinner with the fam... but it means I have curry for dinner! :P Also have football practice tomorrow, and it's due to rain :D YES! Football in the rain = awesome fun-ness :) and no pub this thursday :( cos the dumbass year 13's are to young! Hurry up and be 18 FFS! xD

Ohh wellllllllll. Off to uni in... 9 days. Really have to start packing soon! I've made a mental list of what im going to take, I just have to get my arse in gear and start actually putting things in a bag to take with me! :P Hopefully my flat(do I call them flatmates? I really dont know what they are so I will xD)mates are all decent people, otherwise this 1st year will be a pain in the arse! =/

Oh well, only time will tell, fingers crossed

Seeya peeps!

6 month wait....

HERE I GO! ANOTHER BLOG! FINALLY!

I'll try to remember what the hell I did in the last 6 months, but I know I will fail in doing that, so i'll just give you the higlights.

IM NOW 18 :D I CAN GO TO PUBS AND BUY BOOOOOOOZE :) Havnt have a bad experience down the pub really yet, apart from the stupidly high prices! Although I do prefer going in a small group. Big groups just annoy me, to many people, and there will always be someone there that I dont really like! Where as in small groups, I can invite my best buddies :D One weird thing is that, so far, I haven't brought alcohol thats not in a pint glass, or in a small, cold Smirnoff Ice bottle! :P That will change soon, promise!

Highlight 2... I'm now learning to drive! Perhaps I shoulda be learning when I last posted in this bloggy thing, but seeing as I didnt have any money, I had to wait until my birthday. But this now means that I failed in my mission to be driving before then end of summer, and the start of uni. On the plus side though, when uni starts, i should be only another 4 lessons away from being ready to take my test :) Theory is booked for this Wednesday (I think Im gonna fail it!) so i'll at least not have to worry about that annoyance!

Highlight 3... exams are all done and dusted! AT LAST :D Think they all went well. Actually glad that ESW made me retake my english exam, because I felt like I did a hell of a lot better in that exam th2an I did in the January one. Socio was just socio, "blah blah blah Marx, blah blah blah Parsons". Graphics was so easy, everyone had finished waaaaaay before the 2 hours was up, se we looked around and laughed at each other as we did silly things with out pens, drinks bottles and what ever else we had! Then theres General Studies...

Highlight 4... ummm.... football is back! :D But seeing as half the people that read my blog wont gove a shit about that, lets not talk about this one! :P

I really cant think of much more to say! So.... ummm..... Bye?

I put one foot foward and ended up 20 yards back...

Yes, it's a lyric, Moving to New York - The Wombats, look it up and enjoy!

But this seems to happen to me a lot really, I think I'm going somewhere and then I look else where and it seems like I have a million more things to do/think about. Just like on motorways, when your stuck in traffic. You go past someone, laugh at them "Hahaha, we're moving and your not!" then 3 minuets later, they go speeding past you while your still sat doing 1mph!

But anyway, this same thing happened to me today. I've actually got my head down and Im doing work as ive got English and Graphics work to do for Monday, but I only have 3 days to do it as im going up to my cousins on Thursday. Finish on part of the work, feel good about myself, then realise that I still have shit loads of work to do :( So right now I should be drawing 3D pictures of random things that MIGHT be in my final design for Graphics. I already have on page full of them, I really dont see why I need another! But my arse will get grilled and Mr. Jenkins is being really tight with deadlines apparently, so I have to do it. And thats only one of 9 sheets I have to do. But luckily i've already done 3 :)

But like I said, this is basically my life. I try to move forward, but someone chucks me back. Im not going into a detailed story just to annoy you! :P

Instead I shall talk about Click! The amazing film with Adam Sandler in. Its a brilliant film. Lots of twists to keep you on your toes. And a really good ending! And of course, the comerdy value that you would expect from a film with Mr. Sandler in. Although I do wish I had a remote like that, I can now see why I dont want it aswell...

But anyway, I really must get back to drawing a cupboard (Yay, what fun) so ths is where this story ends.

The End.


P.s. spell check on this is weird, thinks I ment to put Chihuahua when I typed hahaha...

Back by..... well not popular demand but becasue I was getting nagged about my blog!

Right, here I am again, writing my blog that has no real meaning behind it, or any point to it at all!

To start of, 1st new post on the LAPTOP, so a small party is in order... Nur nur nur, busta-move, have some booze and party over, get out of my house!

Right, well spose I should talk about whats on my mind, and for unknown reasons Im gonna list them before I talk about them 1. Why is iTunes not playing music?? 2. Apples iPad 3. Lee Mack Live and 4. Lego magic, then 5. Uni shizzle.

1. Well there is now :)

2. If Im honest, I said I really didnt give a F*** (Ahaha :D) but now I've seen more about it, its whole existence is starting to grow on me! Yes, Its a larger version of the iPhone, but that doesnt mean it does all the same things, just... bigger. The iPad, so Apple have said. combines the Mac and iPhone into on, 10 inch or so touch paddy thingy. And if Im honest, I think Apple has found a whole in the tech market and they've filled it to some extent. All the same apps are there, just bigger and frankly, Band Hero is good on the Touch so on the Pad, must be brilliant fun! Just by watching 2 reviews I think I want one! Yes I have this new lappy which would cost less new then when the iPad is about 10 years old, but I dont give a..... I dont know whether the fact that its Apple has made it more desirable (Would a touch pad from Dell be just as Ohhhhhh-able?!, I dont know) but I just want one! :(

3. (Viki, MISS this part, some jokes will be in it! Sorry, but I cant keep in in me for that long!)

Ahhh Lee Mack :) What a great night that was, the whole Ahaha :D thing above is because of one of his jokes! Basically goes along these lines, In the papers the cover up 'swear words' by placing there 1st letter followed by * thingys. But well read that and just say the word aloud or in our heads depending on how your reading the paper. This brings up an interesting point, if we 'hide' our swear words by placing out hand over our mouth when we say them, does that mean we havnt said them?! Because this is what the papers are sorta doing. Lee used the example of going on some religious show that I dont know then name of, and that just made the joke even more LOLable. There were some sexual jokes and some jokes about the north, of which one was along the lines of, Booze is more expensive, drunk ladies in Newcastle talk about it and the last line of the joke it, "Well she did have a Kebab up her fanny!" and there was also this "A recent study shows that if you took all the chips consumed in the north, people would just reach out and take them back." or something close to that anyway, I cant really remember!
But there was a dude on before Lee, a little warm up act, and he was rather good aswell! So all in all, a very good night out!

4. (Welcome back Viki! )LEGO, I found my lego again :) Ahhh, this has to be the toy of EVERYONES childhoods! How you can grow up with out this I dont know. But we all had some at some point, and we all stood on it at some point! Ouch doesnt do this pain justice! Standing on Lego flipping well hurt like hell!
I dont really have much use for it know, but its still fun to put random pieces together in ramdom places and seeing what it vaguely resembles. I made a building the other day, and its now in my university portfolio of which is being viewed at an interview this Wednesday! =/ SHIT! Anyway, Lego is great fun :)

Finaly, 5. Like Ive just said, portfolio interview this Wednesday. At Herfordshire Uni, for Spatial and Interior Design. Its my second choice, or will be when I get all my offers and rejections in, so its all rather good! 1st choice is UCS in Ipswich and they want to see my portfolio aswell, we just cant decide on a date for the interview! Its all gathering speed now!

I think thats enough as Ive easily set a new record for my longest blog!

Hope I aint bored you readers to much!

See you next time,
Byeeeeeee-bye!